They’re baaack. I’ve just received another of those calls from the “Windows Service Center” which I sadly didn’t have the time to entertain, as I’ve done previously. Being dinner time, they got short shrift, but here’s the latest spiel:

Hello, is that Mr. Cook?

Yes, it is.

Who am I speaking to?

It’s Ami, calling from the Windows Service Center – I was calling to ask if you have a Windows computer at your location in (wrong suburb)?

Yes, I do.

And are you the main user of that computer?

Yes, I am.

I see. Mr Cook, we are calling to let you know that our systems here are detecting a large number of error messages that are causing Internet users to complain to us, and they are coming from your address in (wrong suburb).

I see; that’s very strange. Why did you need to ask me if I had a Windows computer here? Wouldn’t the error messages tell you that information?

Oh, yes, Mr Cook, we know, but we needed to make sure we were talking to the right person, and that you know.

That sounds silly – i understand what you are trying to do, and I don’t have time to talk to you now.

Not even five minutes?

No, I think I’ve been already more than generous with my time. Thank you.

As always, the best advice in these situations is to end the call quickly without providing specific information beyond the phone book entry they have already consulted, and call your friendly local computer geek if you need more reassurance.