Category: Life

I don’t know how long it’s been since I set foot in a public library. It must be a fair while ago, because I found myself struggling with the whole concept of ‘free knowledge’ today. I’ve become so used to handing money to anyone behind a counter that I spent the first few minutes of today’s visit feeling slightly guilty for taking advantage of the facilities. Free Internet Access? You mean I can just read stuff without buying it?
Then I thought back to my most recent council rates notice, pulled up a chair and started drinking deep with a crystal clear concience.
Yes, yet again, another educational experience for the kids on the holidays. And again, more entertainment value in a couple of hours among the shelves than a whole day at Timezone. Spearwood Public Library had put on a ‘Dragon Quest’ today, where the kids completed scavenger hunts for information throughout the library, and won a prize at the end for completing the secret phrase. (I like the thinking behind one of the prizes in the pack – a blank exercise book, so you could write your own…)
Any other ideas for guilt-free, cost-free, fun kids outings?

One of the great advantages of a job which involves telecommuting is the huge lunch-hours you get to spend with the family. Today was one of those days I wouldn’t have swapped for anything.
Ainslie suggested I take the kids for a trip to the museum for a school holiday trip, and I’m glad I did. It was such a treat to see the kids, who’d been huddled over a PlayStation for a good part of the morning, leaping from stuffed Elk to dinosaur bone with barely contained glee. I only half-heartedly berated them for their volume – why would you want to snuff out that sort of thirst for knowledge? One of the staff watching from the corner seemed quietly pleased as each of them called me over to each new exhibit as quiet-loudly as they could (good thing I’m still young enough to know everything).
After we’d seen everything and done a few activities, we emerged only a few dollars lighter, and significantly richer for the experience.
It’s not a slow time at work at the moment, and I’ll be catching up on some of the time lost for the next day or so, but when the kids took time out (between belting out Guy Sebastian songs in the car on the way home) to say a heartfelt thanks for the outing, I knew that I’d made the right investment today.

Being a brand new year, I thought I’d share some baby photos, from the earlier days of BONWAG. Here’s how BONWAG got to look the way it did.

Great news from the Dance Studio; Allanah completed her ‘Royal Academy of Dance’ exams in October, and the results came in this weekend with a ‘commended’ mark of 68!

Our latest bed-time activity in the Cook house is to keep an eye on the skies for the International Space Station. It’s passing right over Perth, and we’ve been able to catch sight of it a few times in the last few days. It’s quite bright and easy to see – if you know where to look. The information at the Heavens-Above site is very accurate – if you know your local co-ordinates. Enjoy!

As a frequent airline traveller, I’m probably not alone in admitting to less-than-rapt attention to the safety demonstration at the start of each flight – I’ve probably seen it repeated enough to be able to recite it by heart (even though Qantas is now at pains to remind us that each aircraft is ‘subtly different‘, so we should sit up and listen this time). Thankfully, I’ve never needed to refer to it or the handy information cards in the seat pocket in front of me (even though some of the illustrations on those things are great fun to make fun of – “Hey, that escape slide looks like gangs of fun”). If I know anything useful from those demonstrations, it’s that you’re not supposed to take luggage or high-heels on the flight – so be careful if you’re going to try that near me, buster. I’ll have to use my whistle to attract someone’s attention.
I’d always wondered whether the oxygen masks actually drop as simply and gracefully as they do on the videos. During our flight from New York to London as part of Ainslie’s and David’s Excellent Adventure, I had my question answered.
The plane was quiet and dark, halfway through the 10 hour flight. We, and many others were soundly asleep. Then, Several Things Happened At Once. The cabin lights blinked on, an alarm sounded, and the oxygen masks descended from the roof. I squinted and blinked at the dangling contraptions for a few seconds – as did my fellow passengers – and shrugged. Ooo-kay. This is like in that video. A tinny voice was telling that the cabin was depressurising, to put the masks on, and that the plane was descending to a lower altitude to restore cabin pressure. Oooo-kay.
Our masks didn’t look like the ones on the video; they were sort of tangled up; so I hopped up to disentangle the masks and sort them out for Ainslie and the person next to her. Problem: they weren’t working. That became a cause for concern for a few other people, who were trying different ones and yanking the masks harder – everyone knows you pull down on the tab to make the oxygen flow. Flow! Damn you! Fit! Then, things seemed to make less and less sense. We weren’t descending, there was no loss of pressure, there was no turbulence. All that had happened was a few masks had dropped, and an alarm. I wouldn’t have registered that the masks were there, if not for the message on the loudspeaker and the glaring lights.
I braced myself for a chorus of people starting to get a little panicked by this development, but it was oddly calm. I think most people were as groggy as I was from being awaken from the Great Grey Slumber of the Jetlagged.
A few seconds later, a slightly-rattled voice came over the speakers “Uh… as some people may have realised, this alert is a false alarm. We’re sorry, but there seems to be a malfunction on the flight deck – there is no emergency – you heard a recorded announcement, which starts automatically when the oxygen masks drop. You may have realised that the masks do not have any oxygen in them. Please don’t worry about the masks – this is a false alarm.”
Muffled groaning ensued.
I think it was only the space of a minute or so between the masks dropping and the final ‘false alert’ message, but it’s amazing the amount of stuff that flies through your brain in that time. Perhaps least significantly: “Hey – there’s enough elastic on this thing to fit a pretty big head.” That, and the wonderfully useful advice they always give you to put the mask on – in the midst of crisis – and ‘breath normally’. Ooooo-kay.
The trip continued for a further several hours, with the masks unable to be retracted, dangling in our faces like yellow Post-it Notes of Doom. I still don’t know exactly what happened, apart from the ‘something going wrong’ defense of the flight crew, but I do recall overhearing a medical problem being discussed while I was half-asleep – before the incident – and quite soon after the masks dropping, a man was led to his seat with a personal breathing apparatus. I’m assuming that when someone muttered the phrase “oxygen mask” someone stabbed at the wrong button on the flight deck. I’d like to assume it was human error and not technical malfunction.
But, on the bright side, I now have some practical experience with airplane oxygen masks, and without having to go through all the nasty bumping and crashing that normally accompanies that experience.
Still, nothing like an oxygen mask scare to leave you short of breath.

I’m certain this is a fairly elaborate joke, but even if it is, it’s an interesting exercise for people interested in the way people use speech patterns and ‘non-language’ in their communication. Language Removal Services offers a ‘service’ to remove langauge from speech, so all you’re left with is the sound of breathing, stammering and stuttering. It’s interesting to see what people sound like when their words are taken out of their speeches.
It’s a cute idea, but I don’t think it’s meant to be taken seriously….

And hot on the heels of the ‘any key’ item; an new take on an old theme: converting a typewriter to work as a computer keyboard.

Are we living in an episode of The Simpsons, here? In one episode, Homer – at the computer – asks ‘Where’s the ‘any’ key?
Compaq has the answer.

Ananova – Children danced in liquid chocolate after lorry overturned
Children in Brazil thought Christmas had come early when a tanker lorry overturned and lost its cargo of liquid chocolate.
Youngsters – and some adults – feasted on the chocolate which covered three lanes of the Pinheiros highway in Sao Paulo.
Some of the more excited children stripped to their underwear and rolled about in the road, covering themselves in chocolate, Jornal Nacional reports